Dear Doctor,
I keep hearing people describe themselves as “empaths” and I’m wondering if that’s an actual personality type. If so, how does that differ from being an empathetic person? I consider myself sensitive and introverted at times—does that mean I’m an empath, too?
Sincerely,
“All The Feels”
Dear All The Feels:
Empath is a term coined by a psychiatrist, Dr. Judith Orloff, to describe someone who is highly attuned to other people’s emotions and energies. This isn’t the same as having empathy, which is the ability to mentally put yourself in another person’s situation and understand or feel their emotions.
The empath personality type isn’t an official diagnosis that’s found in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM). But Orloff devised a 20 question self-assessment test to determine where you may fall along the empath continuum.
Orloff explains that our brains have a specialized group of cells called the mirror neuron system, which is responsible for compassion and empathy. In empaths, this system is thought to be hyperactive, making it difficult to distinguish where their own emotions end and other people’s begin.
It can be helpful to think of empaths absorbing other people’s feelings (positive and negative) the way a sponge absorbs liquid. Sometimes empaths can even take on other people’s physical symptoms. With that in mind, having an empath personality comes with its own unique set of benefits and challenges.
On the positive side, empaths are often intuitive, compassionate, creative, and curious individuals who form deep connections with others. They’re considered good listeners and imaginative storytellers who are gentle and truthful.
The flipside is that being highly sensitive makes empaths more vulnerable to exhaustion, overstimulation, and feeling overwhelmed by other people’s negative emotions and stress. It’s hard enough dealing with our own stress without taking on other people’s worries, right?
Even more concerning is that empaths may be targets for “energy vampires,” which are people who tend to drain your energy and leave you feeling depleted after each interaction.
Another term you may hear is “dark empath,” which is an extreme and dangerous personality type. Like empath, dark empath isn’t an official diagnosis, but a name used to describe someone who uses their empathic abilities to manipulate other people, with ill intent. Someone with antisocial personality disorder or borderline personality disorder may sometimes exhibit the traits of a dark empath.
For those who identify as empaths, self-care and maintaining boundaries is vital. When you’re highly influenced by other people, it can be hard to distinguish your own inner voice. That’s why it’s important that empaths and anyone who is markedly sensitive to crowds, arguing, and other noises carve out alone time to replenish their emotional resources. Spending time in nature can be especially restorative so that empaths can “bounce back” and continue to effectively navigate life’s ups and downs. And if you find yourself truly struggling, please don’t hesitate to seek out a mental health professional.